Curiously, I don't hear the word 'backsliding' a lot in our social milieu. (By contrast, backsliding is practically a buzzword among born-agains.) The rule of thumb, it seems, is either no-mention or mention-a-lot.
The reason, I guess, is that among people touched by the Holy Spirit in a very special way, there are few, if ever, who willfully go back to their old selves. A person so touched changes with a certain degree of permanence. It may not be a total, readily perceptible change, but one knows it is not something capricious, either.
And those who by choice or human weakness go back to their old selves, almost always never come back, most likely from shame. See, the change is...paradigmatic.
Now this is not to condemn people who backslide. The point is, if you find yourself backsliding, it's all the more compelling for you to continue attending a community that nurtures your spiritual needs. After all, who has not sinned again? Who hasn't stumbled and fell to the ground?
It's Satan who rejoices if we give up. It would be unwise to allow Satan to grin and leer at us by giving up. By continuing in spite of our inconstancy and inconsistencies, we have already won half the battle. After all, we attend Mass and go to community not because we are clean and worthy, but precisely because we are not. We recognize our need for God's presence and active role in redeeming our lives. We recognize our helplessness against the devil's attacks. The Christian community life is not a contest about who among the members is the holiest, although holiness is one supreme goal for everyone. Community life is about support, precisely because we know we are weak and bound to fall. Community life is about bulwarks; we know we are under attack that we need a place to run for cover.
As Jesus said, "I came not to condemn the world, but to save it." "I came not for healthy people but for sick ones." Peter Kreeft, in Making Choices, rejoins "What are saints but simply sinners saved?"
Joining community has its risks and I guess among the biggest is the attendant shame when the world takes notice of - and exults over - someone in community falling. Because the world doesn't understand, it would readily cry, "Hypocrisy!"
But then, that's always how it is with being alive. "To hope and to try is to risk despair and failure, but the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing." Only the dead can afford to risk nothing.
9.20.2000
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