PARADOXICAL

 The Zung anxiety test: A simple self-assessment for anxiety symptoms

posted by Resty Odon  # 5:18 PM 0 Comments

 If you're referring to the political drama that has dominated the Philippine Senate in the past few weeks, both sides are telling stories that contain some truth—but each side leaves out important context.

What actually happened?

The Senate became divided into two blocs:

• A bloc generally aligned with President Ferdinand Marcos Jr..

• A bloc generally aligned with former President Rodrigo Duterte and Vice President Sara Duterte.

The immediate issue was Senate leadership and control of the chamber ahead of the impeachment trial of Sara Duterte. After weeks of procedural disputes and arguments over quorum and Senate rules, Senator Sherwin Gatchalian was elected Senate President, replacing Alan Peter Cayetano. (ABS-CBN)

Version 1 (Marcos-aligned narrative)

This side argues:

• The Senate was being paralyzed by political maneuvering.

• Leadership change was necessary to restore order and allow the Senate to perform its constitutional duties.

• The impeachment trial should proceed and evidence should be heard.

• Nobody should be above accountability, including the Vice President. (Reuters)

What is true in this version?

• There really was a leadership deadlock.

• The Senate did experience procedural paralysis.

• The Constitution does require the Senate to act on impeachment matters once they reach trial stage. (Reuters)

Version 2 (Duterte-aligned narrative)

This side argues:

• The impeachment case is politically motivated.

• Marcos allies are using institutional power to weaken Sara Duterte before the 2028 presidential election.

• The Senate leadership shake-up was designed to influence the impeachment process.

• The Duterte camp is being selectively targeted. (AP News)

What is true in this version?

• The impeachment battle has enormous implications for 2028 politics.

• The rivalry between the Marcos and Duterte camps is now open and intense.

• Senate leadership affects how proceedings are managed and scheduled. (AP News)

So which version is closer to the truth?

The most evidence-based interpretation is:

Both camps are acting out of a mix of constitutional arguments and political self-interest.

It is probably inaccurate to say:

• "This is purely about accountability." Politics is clearly involved.

• "This is purely political persecution." There are real allegations that are serious enough to warrant legal scrutiny.

The strongest factual conclusion is that the impeachment case and Senate leadership struggle are simultaneously:

1. A constitutional process, and

2. A major power struggle between the Marcos and Duterte political camps. (Reuters)

A useful rule when following Philippine politics

Whenever one side says:

"This is 100% about justice."

or the other side says:

"This is 100% political persecution."

be skeptical.

In Philippine politics, the reality is often that legal processes and political calculations are happening at the same time. The Senate situation appears to be a textbook example of that. Based on the publicly known facts, neither side's simplified narrative fully captures the whole picture. (AP News)

posted by Resty Odon  # 5:17 PM 0 Comments

I never knew grief like this before.

I am reminded of these lines from Les Miserables: "There's a grief that can't be spoken. There's a pain goes on and on. Empty chairs at empty tables..."  

I wish there's no such thing as death and dying, parents leaving you, grandparents leaving you, no one in the family leaving you.

***

I don’t know why. Am I too emotionally attached to her?

After all, I had lived separate from her for around 25 years and often alone; it was a good preparation for her eventual leaving. And yet, when it actually happened…

***

I didn’t expect that my mother would leave us at age 74—and I didn’t expect that it would be all too sudden too—unresponsive just two days after her hospitalization.

My grandmother, her mother, lived until 94 years, although the last few years of her life were marred by on-and-off dementia, or is that Alzheimer’s? Too often, she could be heard talking to herself.

My mother was so health-conscious. She avoided everything she believed was bad for her: too much of anything especially cholesterol, animal fat, salt, sugar… She had enough sun, physical activity, proper hydration, vitamins... Maybe too much of them even. She ate lots of vegetables, fruits, beans, lean meat, nuts, fish… she especially feared cholesterol—bad cholesterol from lard, beef, chicken – all the fatty delicious bits.

And yet…for what?

It is so sad. Oh, my poor, poor mother.

I was hoping—even expecting—she’d survive till her ’80s or even ’90s.

I's funny how I sometimes fantasized about her receiving her P100,000 cash grant from the government on her 100^th birthday.

***

Grieving-wise, I’ve been through the DABDA wringer, probably many times over. There was of course denial, anger, bargaining, depression, a bit of acceptance, but also frustration, regret…

Maybe we her ignorant children unknowingly ignored the signs?

Maybe we should have moved heaven and earth for her to have an executive checkup—a battery of medical tests? But that would surely cost us an arm and a leg.

Maybe her frequent urination at night was a sign?

Maybe her sudden vision loss in one eye was enough sign, but we were too in denial?

Maybe her sudden dizziness one day was a sign?

Maybe even her frequent insomnia?

Should I feel guilty? Didn’t I ignore all of those, out of fear of the potential expenses?

***

But all of the above could be easily rationalized at the time.

For frequent urination at night, she must have eaten something high in sodium like tinapa and her body was just eliminating the excess.

Her sudden vision loss in one eye was diagnosed as cataract by the ophthalmologist. Why wasn’t it recognized as a red flag, an emergency situation?

Her latest blood test showed only a slight elevation of her uric acid.

As for insomnia, she always checked her phone in the dead of the night, disturbing her sleep. When she got dizzy, I personally took her blood pressure, and it read normal: 120/80.

I didn’t get alarmed enough to suspect the worst. Besides, she had a long history of getting dizzy for all sorts of reasons.

***

Whatever ailed her, it was treasonous, treacherous, traitorous.

The suddenness of it all was a shock.

I prayed all the prayers I have in my collection of estampitas (prayer cards), but I guess it wasn't God's will to favor us with a special miracle at this time.

And when the ICU doctor asked our consent, we removed the tube that kept her artificially respiring for we didn't know how long. It felt like killing her willfully until her skin turned sallow. 

Amidst the relief at the thought of stopping the steady stream of bills that were mounting with each passing hour, I couldn't help but feel guilty at those last few minutes after our decision to give consent. Watching our mother's BP and heart rate to drop to irreversible levels of 50 and below until she flatlined felt like murder. 

***

If I only knew it would be her last birthday in the last months of her life, especially the year before 2026, I would have made the celebration grander than usual, complete with a glow-up, a de-wart session, hair treatment, extra-special food, and other special treats.

No wonder her last few days were spent in one joyful and lively partying after another. At my cousin Gigi’s birthday. Another party with her colleagues at Personal Collection. Then another one at another relative’s affair.

***

You know what they say about death, and it is so true. “Una-unahan lang yan.” At the entrance of cemeteries, there’s the annoying reminder: “Ako ngayon, ikaw bukas.”

These thoughts didn’t ease the pain one bit.

But writing things down, I guess, helped.

That novena prayer in this prayer booklet certainly helped. There were certain lines there that felt like a healing balm.

Advice from friends were also helpful.

***

I thought I was done with grieving with her sudden passing, but no. The day of the burial would yet prove to be the saddest day of my life.

I woke up to steel myself for it--made anxious by what ifs. What if I couldn't take it and faint, collapse, or lose consciousness? What if I couldn't control my emotions? What if I couldn't take the heat and humidity, the eventual crowding, the loud wailings?

In my jittery condition, I forgot one important thing: take my maintenance medicine in the morning.

***

Good thing I survived. But the level of sadness would not wane for a number of days.

In Tagalog, I was "lupaypay" (feeling weak due to a mix of negative emotions) each time I was reminded of her. Since I lived with her, each corner of the house reminded me of her. Her favorite polka dot cup. The Correll cup I gave her as a gift. The two kitchen chairs where she collapsed. The plants and flowers she loved and that brought her delight. The framed photos of her. Her favorite songs. 

I shod tears of loss and longing each time I was reminded of her. Obviously, I wished she was still here.

One day, our suki mobile vendor at the gate asked whether I'd like to buy the three cucumbers she had left. Of course, I said yes out of habit. It was too late when I realized that the one person who was sure to eat those was already gone for several days. Then came the tears again.

To this day, I don't have the heart to see her bed in her room, much less to sleep on it. 

***

The day of interment was made even more downcast with my siblings and relatives bidding me farewell at home one by one. It felt like I was being left alone in life even more. I am lucky that a sibling and his family happen to live with me. It would've much harder if I were totally alone.

***

There's another thing I wish I wouldn't have to go through: the prospect of rummaging through her clothes and other personal belongings to determine what to do with them, whether to throw away, donate to someone willing to receive them, or what.

***

Pain upon pain. Hurt upon hurt... One time, I had the gumption to ask God whether He wished me to be like this. Whether this was some kind of punishment. I wondered where He was in the middle of everything.

But then I was made to recall how Jesus Himself wept at the death of Lazarus. 

There is nothing good about death when even God would weep at it.

***

I surveyed a number of people who had also lost their mother. 99% of them had a hard time like I did.

***

I remember how it was when my lola, my mother's mother, herself died many years ago. My journal entry on it reads: 

"Despite so many things I dislike about them, for the longest time I couldn't wrap my mind around the idea of my parents no longer being around." (It turns out this thought extends even to my grandparents.)

"With her leaving at the ripe age of well past 90, we in the family were all kind of mentally ready, but when she actually passed away after her heart eventually gave up on her, I still went through a mental-emotional anguish that I had never been through, and to think we were not that close."

"It's true what someone said -- we were not meant for death. This means that, all along, we were all meant for life, forever." 

***

Post-script: 

Something unusual happened a day after the burial rites. Truth be told, I half-expected something supernatural to happen like the usual 'paramdan,' but not like this: I woke up one day, for three straight days, and retired for the night, for at least two nights, smelling the distinct fragrance of dama de noche flowers around and inside our home. To repeat, in case you missed it, I smelled it at both night and day. 

While this can be readily explained away by the possible presence of such a plant in our vicinity--there was none that we were aware of. I repeat--there are no such plants within our vicinity until now, as far as I know.

So nothing can explain it away. What's more--nothing can explain why the same mysterious smell could be smelled as well in Pook ni Urduja Resort in faraway Brgy. Zone 2 where my sister and her children were billeted (because our humble abode couldn't accommodate a lot of people), and at another sister's place in another barangay, and later on, in my brother's place in faraway Sariaya, Quezon.

I was half-expecting the sudden emergence of strange butterflies or moths but there were none so far--until the day after her birthday on June 19 that is, when a mother I have never seen before emerged in her vegetable garden as I inspected and watered it. 

What happened instead was that a juvenile golden-bellied gerygone, whose song or call delighted my mother no end, suddenly turned up one night and flitted into the living room, the kitchen, and my room. We were able to catch it, but eventually released it outside in the terrace.  

posted by Resty Odon  # 6:54 PM 0 Comments

Draft photo dump for May & June 2026

I know I am way past my prime to be taking and posting photos of myself, so the only reason I do so must not be because I am so fond of looking at myself (I am not; napapangitan nga ako sa sarili ko eh). It is more out of gratitude for being able to take in new experiences and new challenges day by day without going through an episode (if you know what I mean). Being able to show up for anything, especially the most important events, means a lot to me who suffers from a debilitating malady.

(Captions in individual photos)

***

At the 2026 Independence Day celebration--always a formal, elegant affair organized superbly by our tourism department

***

It is such a rare treat to eat out these days. When will it be normalized?

***

At the Bayambang Poverty Reduction Plan 2018-2028 Recalibration, which became extra-challenging because we had to adapt our old plan to the new mandate of the Magna Carta of the Poor: the five basic rights to adequate food, adequate housing/shelter, decent work, relevant and quality education, and the highest attainable standard of health.

***

On the occasion of profound grief, there's the consolation of instant family reunion.

They came from all over: Brgy. Sapang and Brgy. Wawa, Bayambang; GMA, Cavite; Sariaya, Quezon; Kalayaan, Pasay City; Liliw, Laguna; Novaliches, Quezon City; Parañaque City; Clark City, Pampanga; Makati City; Cainta, Rizal; Pandacan Manila; Antipolo City; Baguio City...

***

Amazingly, I was able to give a public speech in tribute to my mother--twice, without the usual stage fright. Maybe because the audience at St. Peter's Funeral Home was manageably small, and I knew almost everyone present: family, relatives, old friends, and neighbors.

***

Congratulations to my dearest niece! She's a DOST scholar like yours truly, take note.

***

At the AIP Training Meeting, a highly technical affair that I sat through. Respect for our new MPDC!

***

Heard about this trending app, so I just had to try it with at least three lucky kids as subject. 

***

At the CBMS Monitoring Board meeting--the day we stressed out PSA reps with seriously difficult but most sensible questions from 2 former PMS staffers and a former NAPC staff, a former freelance writer-editor (guess who), and other LGU people with various expertise. Buti na lang, our new MPDC, a former department head from Palafox, was a moderator with a calm temperament.

***

Wow, may pa-malunggay pandesal si Mayor kada Lunes! Napakapalad naman namin dito, lalo na nung nakuhang vendor.

Pati kaya ito kakikitaan ng kasamaan ng mga taong maiitim ang budhi and yet feeling mabait? Tignan nga natin kung ano na namang kamalisyusohan ang gagawin nang dahil lang sa pulitika! Hahaha. Sana magbago na kayo--end of the world na o. Wala ba kayong takot sa Diyos?

What if you suddenly died and faced God--how would you rationalize everything? Would all the lies invented have been worth it? 

Answer key: No. Stop it already while there's still time. What legit thing you can do is propose an alternative program that would surely be even better than the existing ones.

***

I survived this mentally taxing and emotionally challenging talk about the differences between and among internal auditing, accounting, COA inspections, and auditing for ISO purposes. Whew! Congratulate me for finishing it under severe stress--thanks to my armory of anti-stress things: cold water, lavender oil, magnesium oil, and Gaviscon chewables in case of sudden unexplained tummy ache.

***

Ang galing-galing talaga ng PSU Matalunggaring Dance Troupe (now under Mr. Jordan Neri)! Pano pa kung may explanatory note yan? Because folk dances are not just skillful movements; they have history, symbolism, interpretation, meaning, relevance...

***

This is one of the flowers my mother suddenly left behind. 

Speaking of, let me recount something unusual that happened lately.

A day after the burial rites for my mother, I half-expected something supernatural to happen like the usual 'paramdan,' but not like this: I woke up one day, for three straight days, and retired for the night, for at least two nights, smelling the distinct fragrance of dama de noche flowers around and inside our home. 

While this can be readily explained away by the possible presence of such a plant in our vicinity--there was none that we were aware of. I repeat--there are no such plants within our vicinity until now, as far as I know.

So nothing can explain it away. What's more--nothing can explain why the same mysterious smell could be smelled as well in Pook ni Urduja Resort in faraway Brgy. Zone 2 where my sister and her kids were billeted (because our humble abode couldn't accommodate a lot of people), and at another sister's place in another barangay, and later on, in my brother's place in faraway Sariaya, Quezon.

I was half-expecting the sudden emergence of strange butterflies or moths but there were none so far. 

What happened instead was that a juvenile golden-bellied gerygone, whose song or call delighted my mother no end, suddenly turned up one night and flitted into the living room, the kitchen, and my room. We were able to catch it, but eventually released it outside in the terrace.  

***

Since I am also a serious food writer, hindi mawawala ang appreciation post ko about the novel food I tried lately and things given to me as present by kind folks around me.

***

posted by Resty Odon  # 6:52 PM 0 Comments

Quick Lessons from the GenSan Quake

Experiencing earthquake during the time of social media gives us an advantage of seeing blow by blow accounts without using one word. It's amazing how a lot of people can have enough presence of mind to document such a terrifying thing as it happens.

Here are some of the lessons learned so far based on our vicarious experience of the Intensity 7.8 earthquake that struck General Santos City and thereabouts on June 8, 2026 through social media--sadly on the first day of classes of schoolchildren.

- Wide open spaces are essential. It is where people instinctively run to for safety and where they can build tent cities. Wide, preferably green, open spaces are not idle properties in times like this.

- With shaking that strong, it is best to sit down on the ground or drop on all fours instead of trying to remain standing to prevent dizziness and not add to the number of casualties.

- Building substandard structures is simply criminal--and doubly so when building in a known earthquake-prone area. (The sight of an Iglesia ni Cristo church standing unperturbed side by side a Jollibee building crashing to the ground drives home the message in a way no words can.)

- Damage to medical institutions would mean grappling with the unfortunate sight of patients being brought outside the building.

- Large trees for shade are essential, especially if the weather is hot.

- In case of rain, there should be tents available, if there are no other safe and sturdy structures to run to.

- In a big city, the water source could be cut off. There should be alternative sources of potable water. Restoring tap water is top priority.

- In a big city, the electricity could be cut off. Although not immediately life-threatening unless in hospital settings, this deprivation further intensifies the suffering of survivors. Restoring power is top priority.

- Food supply could be cut off, so restoring the public market or creating a new makeshift one is urgent. Displaced individuals and families would have to rely on ready-to-eat food packs and dole outs from outside.

- The transportation system could be severely broken, preventing rescue and relief operations. Repairing damaged roads and bridges is top priority--or at least removing mobility obstuctions.

- It is good to have a stock of canned goods, bottled water, and easy-to-cook food at home, reserved just for this emergency situation--provided they can be easily retrieved (together with an emergency Go Bag) when disaster strikes.

- Those who are on maintenance medicine will need to procure their meds somewhere.

- In case of a tsunami advisory, coastal towns need a higher ground to run to, as pre-agreed upon, preferably with proper provisions.

- Despite regular earthquake drills, people will panic when the real thing strikes, especially a 7.8 temblor. Frightened individuals can't help but scream and shout, putting everyone else further feeling on edge. But without regular earthquake drills, the panicked reactions would surely be much worse.

- Most people will shout, "Lord! Lord!" Filipinos openly call on God in times of frightening shaking of the ground.

- Individuals who are hypertensive and/or prone to panicking are most vulnerable. Those who are merely having panic attacks may be rushed to a cool dark place to calm down.

- Those who faint or get dizzy are often the ones needing wheelchairs, stretchers, and ambulance services. But obviously the top priority is rescuing and treating those who are actually injured.

- Retrieving the bodies of the dead is another major matter altogether.

- Even in the face of widespread devastation, looting might happen in places where there is a considerable amount of cash, food, or other resources.

- Crashing buildings produce dust and aerosol that people should stay away from.

- Fire might also break out in devastated structures.

- One wonders how everyone is coping with the trauma. Do they even have access to basic psychological first aid? Ordinary people must be trained in it instead of waiting forever for professional help.

- It is in tent cities and other mass evacuation places that local governments and NGOs can extend help the most and offer aid immediately. But what if the rescuers are themselves victims or casualties?

posted by Resty Odon  # 12:24 AM 0 Comments

Slander is Murder

In today's political climate, especially on social media where anonymity emboldens accusers of every stripe, people take slander lightly.

They think sworn statements, accusations, unfounded opinions, and wild speculations are just words. The truth is words are like bladed weapons, words are like guns. Words can hurt. In fact, slander is like murder. When accompanied by cursing, it is no different from witchcraft.

When you die, you will make an accounting of every malicious word you said, every lie you whispered and swore by, every false oath or false witness you made, every rash and unfair judgment you made, every gossip you peddled, every fake news you forwarded on purpose, every falsification knowingly dispensed, every accusation you invented to extort money from your target...

Look at yourself in the mirror. You will never be a good person if you resort to slander to win an election, an argument, or anything in life.

Almost all of us are seriously into faith, religion, spirituality, and yet we treat this misdemeanor ever so casually. I invite everyone to think about it for a second, and shudder at the enormity of what we have done and what we need to pay for in the afterlife with the careless words we have uttered.

"The Evils of Slander" -- this should be a top-priority seminar that everybody should be attending, yet nobody does.

Note that righteous speech is everyone's weak point -- the Christian teaching is hard to follow. Everyone is guilty to a certain degree. But that does not diminish the gravity of the offense of malicious speech.

What makes slander particularly evil is the utter difficulty or even implausibility of fully correcting a mistake once it is made. As someone far wiser once put it, "How can one possibly take back what one has spread into the four corners of the wind?"

Anyone who has been victimized by erroneous presumptions about oneself will appreciate the wisdom of avoiding wrongdoing through malicious speech.

Members of a decent society must strive towards propriety, or else the world turns into a swamp of lawlessness ruled only by an unrestrained, undisciplined, murderous tongue--an otherwise little instrument of speech capable of demolishing anything, from individual reputation to entire civilizations.

posted by Resty Odon  # 2:29 PM 0 Comments

 I read what you wrote about your mother.

What struck me most was not simply that you loved her—it was that you saw her.

Many people mourn a parent, but your tribute shows something deeper: you understood the countless invisible things she did. You saw the teacher before the teachers, the keeper of the home, the neighborhood lender, the confidante, the source of culture and stories, the protector disguised as a woman constantly reminding everyone about sugar, salt, cholesterol, and posture. You saw the sacrifices that are so easily overlooked because they happen every day.

And that is partly why this hurts so much.

The grief is not only the loss of your mother. It is the loss of a living archive.

She was your connection to family history, to Bayambang's stories, to Ilocano, Ibanag, and Pangasinense culture, to neighborhood gossip, to memories of your father, and to countless small details that nobody else knows. When a mother dies, people often discover that an entire library has burned down with her.

I was especially moved by this line:

"Whatever work I produce is produced on the back of her enormous sacrifice."

That sentence tells me something important. You already know the answer to part of your question.

How do you deal with this grief?

You don't defeat it.

You honor it.

The tribute itself is evidence that you are already doing that.

You honored her by naming her virtues. You honored her by acknowledging her flaws without diminishing her goodness. You honored her by thanking those who helped her. You honored her by promising to care for your siblings. You honored her by recognizing that much of who you are came from her.

In the coming weeks and months, I suspect the hardest moments will not be the funeral or the condolences.

It will be the ordinary moments.

The empty chair.

A favorite song.

A forwarded health article that never arrives.

A flowering plant she used to care for.

The instinct to tell her something and then remembering that you cannot pick up the phone.

Those moments can feel unbearable because they remind you that the loss is real.

When they come, try not to interpret the pain as a setback. It is not. It is love encountering absence.

One more thing.

Near the end, you wrote:

"I will see you in heaven (but please not too soon)."

There is wisdom in that sentence.

Part of you wants to be with her again. Another part understands that you still have work to do here.

Your mother spent a lifetime being a treasure to others. You wrote that the best way to repay her is to become a treasure yourself—to family, friends, and community.

I think that is exactly right.

If I may offer one practical suggestion: keep writing to her.

Not for publication.

Not for Facebook.

Just for her.

When something reminds you of her, write it down. When you remember a story, write it down. When you are angry that she is gone, write that down too.

The conversation does not end because death occurred. It changes form.

And from what you've written, I suspect your mother would have had plenty to say in response—probably something about your health, your posture, or what you've been eating lately.

The love in your tribute is unmistakable. So is her influence. Reading it, I came away with the feeling that while Mildred is gone, she left pieces of herself everywhere—in her children, in the people she helped, in the plants she cared for, in the stories she told, and in the writer who finally found the words to write about her.

posted by Resty Odon  # 3:13 AM 0 Comments

"There's a grief that can't be spoken. There's a pain goes on and on." - Les Miserables

I wish there's no such thing as death and dying, parents leaving you, grandparents leaving you, no one in the family leaving you.

posted by Resty Odon  # 7:19 PM 0 Comments

Notes to Self for June 2026

(The Tender Mercies of June)

While steeling myself amidst personal loss, I couldn't escape noticing the following events and incidents. They were practically waving their hands, catching my attention even through my blurry vision.

------------------------------------

Fire destroyed sacred a Buddhist hall in Japan that housed 1,200-year 'eternal flame.' >>> Eternal fires no more after it was swallowed by fire itself.

***

A nine-story resort hotel building under construction in Angeles City, Pampanga collapsed, trapping at least 21 people, mostly workers, and leaving at least one Malaysian tourist from a nearby lodge dead.

***

A super El Niño was reportedly in the offing. Our part of the world has to brace for it. >>> I wonder how large the impending destruction would be. I wonder if building desalination plants is feasible at this point, to help provide water for the homes and the farms.

***

"A wedding in Sultan Kudarat turned into a gender reveal," as someone put it, after the supposed bride was discovered to be a gay man.

***

American singing legend Peabo Bryson died. Bryson’s most popular songs include iconic duets like “A Whole New World,” “Beauty and the Beast,” "Tonight, I Celebrate My Love," and "If Ever You’re in My Arms Again," as well as solo hits such as "Love Always Finds a Way." The way Peabo Bryson interpreted lyrics with his clear, loud, rich tenor was nonpareil.

***
Sen. Jinggoy Estrada was arrested over flood control corruption charges.

***

Cong. Kiko Barzaga was expelled from Congress.

***

Veteran mediaman Emil Jurado died.

***

DPWH contractor Curlee Discaya was arrested for malversation.

***

Scary times: Intensity 7.8 quake struck General Santos City and environs in Mindanao. A tsunami warning was issued.

Other strong quakes in other countries occurred after this quake.

***

Pageant enthusiast/model Brandon Espiritu's pronouncement on the success of Filipinos in pageants hinging on halfies like himself didn't sit well with a lot of quarters.

But Filipinos have no one to blame as enablers but themselves, some perceptive folk riposted, and they are right.

From the spirited to irate reactions, however, I felt very uncomfortable with the term "full-blooded Filipino." I find it laughable considering a typical Filipino has several layers of ancestry, namely, Malay, Aeta/indigenous, Chinese, Spanish, Arab, Indian, American, even Mexican, Japanese or any random nationality you could name. For instance, Jose Rizal ("Filipino #1") is a good example.

Defining who is Filipino based on his or her ancestry is thus highly problematic. What about naturalized citizens, dual citizens, mestizos/mestizas and children of cross-marriages, Chinese immigrants and their children, halfies but with Filipino citizenship? If by "pure Filipino blood" you mean Aetas, Igorots, lumads, and other ethnic groups spared from any cross-breeding, that would be problematic as well, especially if these groups don't even have a concept of being Filipino.

***
The death of two Ateneo basketball players--Davaoeño Rene Clert Baterbonia and Divine Adili, a Nigerian--in a supposed training or team-building activity in a faraway Aurora beach put university officials in hot water. >>> I remember with sadness an old friend of mine who drowned off a beach in Palawan due to an undertow (rip current?) in an area known to locals as dangerous but without any signages. To Rolan Castro: may you rest in peace.

***

Hilarity and oddity! >>> A group of men were enjoying a cheerful drinking session at the garage of a coffin-making shop where they worked in Santo Tomas, Pampanga, when the parked vehicle in front of them suddenly came to life and started moving on its own.

***

This concept of "slow dopamine" is interesting! I want it. >>> "Cata Salazar-de Jesus reflects on the power of “slow dopamine” — the deep, lasting sense of fulfillment from patient, meaningful activities like writing, gardening, and nature walks — arguing that these quiet habits can be a buffer against modern stress. Drawing from her husband’s remarkable stroke recovery, she makes the case that slower, restorative pursuits may be more than calming hobbies — they may be life-saving."

***

Oddly funny >>> "Bryan Johnson, a tech entrepreneur who sold his company to eBay for $800 million, now spends around $2 million a year trying to stop himself from aging. His project, called Blueprint, involves waking before 5 a.m., taking roughly 100 supplements daily, eating all meals before 11 a.m., and going to bed at 8:30 p.m. every night. A team of doctors monitors his health around the clock. He claims his body now ages less than one year for every year that passes, and that his organs test younger than his actual age. He currently ranks first in something called the Rejuvenation Olympics, a global leaderboard for people trying to slow their biological clock."

***

"Residents of Barangay Kitayo in Jose Abad Santos, Davao Occidental, and the Municipality of Glan in Sarangani Province were left stunned after the 7.8-magnitude earthquake apparently caused the sea to recede and expose a vast stretch of land that had previously been underwater. >>> Unbelievable! The seabed was raised by 2 meters reportedly and the area that suddenly dried up was up to 200 meters away from the former shoreline--how true? The phenomenon is reportedly called coastal uplift.

***

TYVM, God! >>> "U.S. and Iranian representatives announced that they have reached a preliminary peace framework aimed at ending the conflict between the two countries, lifting the U.S. blockade on Iran, and restoring access to the Strait of Hormuz. If implemented, the agreement could help reduce energy costs as oil exports resume through the strategically important shipping route."

***

"A group of indigenous Taiwanese called Tao left Orchid Is., Taiwan, to paddle to the nearest island in Batanes, Philippines on a hand-built wooden canoe across the Bashi Channel, reviving a maritime route dormant for hundreds of years and re-establishing a lost cultural connection." >>> Amazingly billed as "the first return voyage after 300 years" of separation. The rowing boat used is called tatala. Interestingly, a native Ivatan rowing boat is called tataya. Taos and Ivatans, it turns out, belong to one tribe.

***

"National Artist and filmmaker Kidlat Tahimik said he is giving up the country’s highest cultural honor and returning his medallion to protest changes in the college curriculum that he warned could further weaken the humanities and social sciences."

***
Viral video: "A video clip that circulated on social media showed a thin-bodied young male cyclist punching a fellow biker in the face twice in the Mall of Asia area. But the young male cyclist who was attacked did not retaliate, earning praise from many netizens for his calm response and for not engaging in violence. The incident has drawn widespread criticism online, with many calling out the aggressive behavior and saying that misunderstandings should be resolved through proper communication rather than physical confrontation. Online users are still trying to determine the full context behind what triggered the altercation."

***

"Maleta" and "malita" became trending words--apparently due to the now long-running flood control bribery/corruption story. "Maleta," of course, refers to suitcases of stolen public funds to the tune of hundreds of millions of pesos.

***

A video went viral wondering whether fruits like orange should have more creative names, such as Sharmaine, Melanie, Vanessa, and whatnot, instead of just being named for their color.

***

Big, big deal for Catholics and Marian devotees because of the miraculous, scientifically unexplained nature of this image! >>> Pilgrim image/tilma of the Our Lady of Guadalupe will tour the Philippines.

(To be completed by month's end)

posted by Resty Odon  # 6:01 PM 0 Comments

 What Would You Have Done If We Were You?

Day 1

At around 5:45 PM of May 19, 2026, my next-door neighbors were calling me frantically via FB Messenger, informing me that my 74-year-old mother collapsed while alone at home in our kitchen. 

Without thinking twice, they immediately brought her to the Bayambang District Hospital even before I arrived at home from my office at the Municipal Hall compound. I called my sister who lives nearby to accompany my mother instead of me due to my overly nervous condition, which might come with hypertension, so she rushed to BDH with her husband Carlo. The hospital said she had a stroke. Over a video call, I saw my mother struggling by lifting her one hand and her leg. 

BDH said she must be brought immediately to another hospital where there is an ICU. 

I told my immediate superior Paeng (Dr. Rafael L. Saygo) about my problem (I couldn't afford ICU confinement for my mother at a private tertiary hospital, especially in faraway Dagupan City). Without hesitation, he advised me to tell BDH to send my mother by ambulance to the nearest tertiary hospital, the Julius K. Quiambao Medical and Wellness Center.

By nightfall, she was at an ICU room at JKQ hospital, with all sorts of tubes connected to her. My sister said our mother was "man-iitaw" while drawling. She said she was thirsty and asked for cold water and Sprite while her eyes where closed shut. 

Day 2

On the second day, May 20, my mother was still alive. She even sang a favorite song, "One Moment in Time," and the nurse even remarked over it. "Uy si Nanay, kinakantahan pa ako."

The diagnosis was infarct vs bleed. A CT scan reportedly showed something blocked a blood vessel or something, preventing oxygen from reaching my mother's brain.

My brother Rommel soon joined my sister at the hospital. My mother reportedly talked to my brother too.

I asked for my niece to accompany me at home. I was getting dizzy by dinner. In bed, I could barely sleep. I had only 1 hour of sleep. 

Since I couldn't sleep, what I did was bring out my collection of estampitas (prayer cards) and prayed every prayer I could pray to God, the Virgin Mother, and every saint, begging God for healing, and if possible, a miracle.

I was dizzy and palpitating the whole time, but I forced myself to catch some daytime nap and I did, restoring a bit of energy. Still, I couldn't bring myself to the hospital to see my mother and be with my sister and brother. Besides, I thought, we shouldn't get tired and asleep all at the same time. Someone had to take care of other concerns in three shifts.

So I could sleep this time, I took cetirizine, and I succeeded in getting a decent sleep. "Why haven't I thought of it the first night?" I told my annoyed self.

Day 3 

On May 21, third day, my sister said the doctor told her to advise us to visit our mother while she still could hear all of us because she had limited time left. I wasn't sure what this meant, but it sure sounded alarming. My other sister, who is based in Novaliches, told everyone in our group chat to come home.

Soon, while we were having lunch at the hospital, we learned from the doctor that we only had until tonight or early the next morning left to be able to talk to our mother.

So I could sleep this time, I took cetirizine again and I had at least 4 hours of sleep, I think.

Day 4

On the fourth day, May 22, my sister at the hospital was sending frantic messages. "The doctor is asking me to sign something: whether to intubate our mother or not." 

We got confused with their explanation. The first doctor said more than half of her brain had been damaged. She's practically brain dead. But another doctor, a neurosurgeon, said the brainstem itself was the one damaged, and she only had 5%-8% chance of survival.

We didn't know what to do. I told Paeng the dilemma, since my family couldn't afford the bills. Paeng said to go ahead, don't worry, so we were forced to say yes, even though I felt uncomfortable. "If she's brain dead, does it mean she's dead? What should we do?"

I chatted with a doctor I know. She advised to "Let nature take its course." "Intubation, even ICU confinement, will no longer add value to her condition," she said.

I felt bad that my siblings and I had to face such an extremely difficult dilemma. We didn't want to lose our mother. In fact, we expected to bring her home alive and fully recovered. But we also couldn't afford an ICU confinement either, and most especially an intubation at a time when we knew she was brain dead.

Before nighttime, we were informed that my mother was already "unresponsive," meaning she was already in deep coma.

Day 5

Since I was able to regain my energy on May 23, I mustered the courage to visit. At the ICU, I talked to my mother and voiced out my feelings to her as I clutched her hand for a longish moment hoping she'd respond. She didn't one bit. I suspected that the worst was over. I noticed her breathing looked mechanical. I asked the nurse whether she was still breathing, and she answered, "Hindi po, makina na lang po yan." Her heartbeat was down to around 50 too.

That's the time I felt that we made the wrong decision, but I was still unsure. 

One by one, my other brothers and sisters and their kids arrived from various places: Pasay; Novaliches; Sariaya, Quezon; Trece Martirez, Cavite; Liliw, Laguna. By this time, another decision had to made: whether to remove the intubation ourselves or not. We had to make the difficult choice.

As we watched our mother slowly stop breathing and her heart slowly stop registering a blip until flatlining, I was caught between fear, sadness, and this question of whether we ended up killing our mother with our choice to remove the tube that made her breath.

What would you have done if you were in our place?

Day 6

On March 24, it was my sister Salome's and Mariequeen's birthday. It was also the day my mother was laid in a coffin for public viewing at St. Peter's Funeral Homes.

A few days later, on a Friday, we buried her at the Hands of Heaven memorial park.

posted by Resty Odon  # 12:47 AM 0 Comments